bcg blog

Packing Light

If you’re going on vacation, how long before you leave do you start thinking about what you’re going to pack? I’m convinced there are two camps of thought on this question:

1. Thirty days, which my wife is a loyal member of; or
   
2. Thirty minutes, which I find to be much more rational.
   

We have very different approaches to packing due to this difference as well. She packs on a “just-in-case” basis which leads to approximately sixty percent of the things she packs never making it out of the suitcase. I take a more minimalist approach to packing which leads to about seventy-five percent of what I pack being worn multiple times. 

I operate with the mindset that if I’m not sure I’ll need it, then I’m not taking it. My wife operates with the mindset that if she might need it, then she is taking it with her. Both approaches have accompanying burdens that must be accepted. 

For her, she has to drag around a bunch of stuff she’s never going to use and she commits a month of mental contemplation to a decision on each item to determine if it makes the cut. I don’t have to lug around a bunch of unnecessary items or waste bandwidth on a month’s worth of decisions. However, I do occasionally end up on vacation without a few things that I need. 

She might say more often than occasionally.
I would say, it’s always worked out just fine.

Why Should We Care?
What are you carrying with you that you don’t need?
Don’t lie to yourself. There’s stuff.

Here are a few:

• Fear of Other People’s Opinions - FOPO (Fear of Other People’s Opinions) has become such an issue for people to deal with that it was given it’s own acronym. For most people, it starts in their closet before their day really even begins. What they choose to wear is sifted through an arduous series of potential thoughts that we forecast others will have. This senseless deliberation is baggage that doesn’t need to be carried. As easily as we weigh other’s opinions we can also choose to ignore them, make our choices based on our own thoughts, and move forward in our life with full disregard for the trivial judgment of others.
  
• Fear of Failure - This is very closely tied to FOPO because it’s often not the failure people fear, but the ridicule and opinions others will have if they aren’t deemed a success. But, those who actually do fear falling short are a slave to an imaginary master. They’ve been dooped to believe that the scoreboard posted to the public is the only one there is. It’s not. It never is. We have the freedom, power, to choose our scoreboard. Which means we also get to decide when the clock reaches zero. And, if the clock isn’t at zero then the game isn’t over. Virtually every outcome society deems a failure is an incomplete picture of an ongoing process. Let it go - those you lead will thank you, including your family.
  
• Expectations of Reciprocity - This binds us up because it messes with our purpose. Although we may initially act out of genuine care, our purpose becomes distorted quickly when we start keeping score of favors. Our purpose can shift dramatically leading us to choose our actions as a means to right the score rather than an expression of our values, which leads us to resentment. When we carry resentment, we weigh ourselves down with an unnecessary burden that only impacts our actions, and those we are leading, negatively.
  

REAL TALK - Action Steps
It’s easy to say “just let go of it” but much more difficult to actually do it. Here are a few ideas to help you decide what you should be packing with you and what you should leave behind.

• Awareness 
  
  • Pareto’s Principle applies. Twenty percent of what we do drives our life. The key, of course, is picking the right things to be in that twenty percent. Pay attention to what you are doing to be the most productive, have the most enjoyment, and feel the most fulfilled. Likewise, become aware of what you are doing when you waste time, are the most frustrated, and feel empty.
    

• Decide
  
  • Make clear, strong commitments to taking action. Bright lines are critical for success. For example, deciding to drink less soda is a blurry line. While committing to drink no soda or no soda during the work week is a bright line. Bright lines are the signs of a clear decision and strong commitment.
    

• Act
  
  • Do what brings you more productivity, enjoyment, and fulfillment more. Do what brings you less productivity, enjoyment, and fulfillment less. 
    

We have become accustomed to loading our suitcase with far too many thoughts, concerns, and opinions - of both ourselves and others. These do nothing but cloud our ability to live, and appreciate, our own values consistently. By eliminating the unnecessary we make room for the essential.

Checkout Surrender the Outcome on Amazon and order The Score That Matters with Ryan Hawk & Brook Cupps before its release in March 2024. The latest blog from Blue Collar Grit can be found here!