Admire the FrameHave you ever thought about how good someone else is at something?
With no envy or jealousy - only admiration and appreciation? There really isn’t anything hard about it. We see greatness all around us, but how often do we recognize it? The obvious explanation is that we’re selfish, all of us. We think about ourselves - what we’re wearing, what we look like, and what we’re driving. The funny thing is: we think other people are thinking us. They’re not. They’re thinking about themselves. So, stop worrying about what they’re thinking. Now, as for you … In Dan Millman’s book, The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, he quotes japanese psychiatrist Shoma Morita as saying: “When passing by a mirror, notice the frame.” Why Should We Care? My daughter, Ally, is the most thoughtful person I know. She is constantly thinking about ways to make other people’s day better. Whether it’s just the right birthday present or a simple handwritten note, it seems she is consistently looking outside herself. Al is 20 years old now, so she’s written me a lot of notes over the years. Like any dad, all of them are special but the one she left on the counter for me to find last year is my all time favorite. Following our state championship basketball game last season we had a pretty cool family night with just the four of us and Coach Leiker, who is an equal part of our family. After all the celebration with the team, former players, and community; we didn’t get back to our house until about 2am. We sat around and talked about the game and events of the night for about an hour before heading to Waffle House around 4am. I know it may seem weird to a lot of people, but coaching basketball is what our family does so it all made sense to us. Of course, plenty more stories were shared throughout the morning. The ‘night’ ended with Gabe going to the gym to get some shots up around 5am. A pretty cool end to an unbelievable night. I woke up the next morning to one of the most memorable parts of the entire season for me. This note from Ally: Dad - To watch all of your and Gabe’s hard work come to fruition was one of the best moments of my life. I’m so happy for both of you. I love you! - Dink She not only looked completely outside of herself, but she had the courage to share it. I wish I could take credit for her ability, and willingness, to look at the frame and not in the mirror. But, she’s far better at it than I will ever be. REAL TALK - Action Steps There is greatness all around us. We just have to look for it and understand what it
There is greatness all around us. We just have to look for it and understand what it is. Greatness isn’t achievement like we are led to believe. No … it’s going for it. We know it’s true. Our body doesn’t lie to us like society does. Have the courage to look for, and appreciate, the greatness in those around you. For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. We would love to know how we could help!
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Can't or Won'tNick Saban, head football coach at Alabama, made the comment “it takes what it takes” in a press conference in reference to the illusion of choice. His point was that too many people think they have a lot of options when, in reality, there are very few choices on the path to excellence. As Saban said, “it takes what it takes.”
So, the only real choice is will you do what it takes or not? Is it really a question of can or can’t rather than will or won’t? That’s not how we like to think about it. We like to look at it as being a talent or skill we were blessed with or have acquired through our commitment and hard work. We have something that someone else doesn’t have. The opposite is also a reality. When we don’t achieve something or perform at the level we want, we like to attribute it to our lack of talent that we didn’t receive. We just weren’t given the same gifts that others were. Why Should We Care? Well, good news … or bad news. Will or won’t is the question, not can or can’t. That’s good news because it relieves us of the need to be endowed with every necessary talent to accomplish our goals. We aren’t all beginning at the same starting line, but we’re all in the same race. A different starting point doesn’t eliminate us from contention. Sure the path, and challenges, will be different, but the potential doesn’t change. It’s not a matter of can or can’t, but of will or won’t. Will you embrace the process it takes to reach excellence? Will you choose to stay diligent and faithful to the seemingly meaningless, mundane habits necessary to consistently perform at your best? Will you approach your challenges as opportunities to reinforce your conviction to the goal or as threats to your hope and confidence in achieving them? REAL TALK - Action Steps Maintaining our will is critical to our pursuit of excellence. This may seem simple, but it’s not. Choosing an empowering mindset of will over a victim mindset of can’t requires numerous small habits that lead to the big habit of intentional living. Here are a few to get you started.
The question is rarely can we do something. More than likely it’s: are we willing to do what it takes. I’m not saying the answer to that is always yes. I’m saying that’s almost always the question. It’s not can you? It’s will you? For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. We would love to know how we could help! The Residual EffectWhere you are now is not a result of the present, but the past. All the benefits you are experiencing, all the troubles you are facing, are the side effects of decisions you made weeks, months, or years ago.
Residual is an adjective used to describe what is “remaining after the greater part or quantity has gone.” This not only applies to the edges of a pop tart, but also to the decisions we make. Every choice we make leaves residue. Every. Single. One. There are no exceptions. A sound understanding of this is clearly a significant aspect of leadership. We all realize that our choices impact far more than just ourselves, or even our teams. Likewise, our past choices impact our future choices. The residual effect of our choices has a major influence on the choice we may have down the road. Why Should We Care? I’m confident most people acknowledge this residual effect in their lives. Some more than others, obviously, but it’s pretty hard to dispute in its entirety. More often, I’ve found people are simply not fully aware of the far-reaching influence it can have. Here are a few examples that come to mind:
REAL TALK - Action Steps I also thought I would include a few things that we too often dismiss as insignificant, but leave a major residue and greatly impact our future self.
What we choose today impacts tomorrow. We would all be better served if we were mindful of that reality in our day to day living. Nothing, and no one, in life operates in isolation. The residue of today’s decisions will determine the choices of tomorrow. For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. We would love to know how we could help! Win The EdgesChuck Noll, long-time NFL coach for the Pittsburgh Steelers, was quoted as saying “Before you can win a game, you have to not lose it.” Few of those things required to ‘not lose it’ require significant talent.
I think understanding this is the first step on the path to excellence. Far too often we become affixed by the allure of the most public, or popular, aspects of our job. That’s not where you don’t lose … You don’t lose by being faithful in the details of the foundational aspects of your job. As a coach, the winning play at the end of a game is on Sportscenter. It’s celebrated and lifted up as the difference in the game. But, that’s not where you don’t lose. You don’t lose based on your habits and behaviors in practice leading up to the game. You don’t lose based on your mental preparation and your willingness to buy into your teammates. You don’t lose based on your discipline to apply what you did in practice to the game. What Noll is talking about is considered ‘The Edges’ by most people. To the people striving for excellence, it’s the core. The core has to be priority number 1 and it needs to be clear to your team that this is the case. Why Should We Care? The pursuit of excellence isn’t a crowded path, but it’s a narrow one. It takes what it takes. There are no passes, no excused absences, and no good-enoughs. Everyone on this path takes care of the core. That is no longer the separator. That’s the ticket for admission at the highest level. The leaders of these teams understand Noll’s warning and lead accordingly. So, the question becomes, how do we separate ourselves? How do we continue the pursuit of excellence? This is where the true edges begin. They don’t just become A factor. They become THE factor. The thing that distinguishes excellence among teams is their ability, and willingness, to win the edges. REAL TALK - Action Steps They probably aren’t what you think. They’re simple. They require little, to no, talent.
Not losing has to be first. We need that foundation. Don’t try to skip it and don’t forget about it. The things necessary to not lose are critical to revisit consistently. ‘The Edges’ can be thought of as more of a how than a what. As we continue to develop, ‘The Edges’ will take shape and become the difference. For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. We would love to know how we could help! Dream Big. Live Small.I love dreamers.
People that accept no limitations for what they can do. People that dare to do what others say can’t be done. They’re inspiring. I believe the dream, or vision, is the first step of leadership. Leaders see things differently. They don’t accept the status quo, or relegate the future to what has always been done. No, no, no … leaders expect to make a difference, or else, why lead? We all know it’s ‘the different’ that changes the world. The ‘weirdos’ that are crazy enough to try something that everyone has always said is impossible. Those are the people that leave an impact. The same is true for leaders of teams. It may not be world changing, or it may be, but it still requires a big dream and the courage to try to make it a reality. Why Should We Care? If the dream, or vision, is the first step of leadership; then the next thousand steps belong to humility and work. Living small is grounded in humility. Lack of humility robs us of the desire to improve. It tells us over and over that we’re good, or at least better than the next guy. Why would we work at something if we already think we’re good enough? Work is always the process. It’s ironic that we all know this to be true, yet when we look at the successes of the people around us we are so quick to attribute their success to a lucky break or a preordained gift from above. One of the last things we concede is that they must’ve worked at it. The people around us experiencing excellence may have been given a gift all right, but it wasn’t what you think that’s led to that excellence. Sure, others may have been blessed with a knack for numbers or remarkable athleticism or an ability to connect with others, but the gift that’s led to excellence is almost always a willingness, a desire, to work. That’s what living small is. There is no overnight success. It’s not a thing. The big dreams that we encourage those we lead to have can only become reality by committing to the day to day work. We must embrace the sacrifices that this work demands or move on to a different dream. There is no other way, so stop looking. REAL TALK - Action Steps It’s the combination of the two, dreaming big and living small, that creates excellence. One without the other leads to mediocrity and frustration
The only combination that leads to excellence is dreaming big and living small. A pursuit of something that seems out of reach, almost unattainable ... but maybe. Combined with a work ethic that constantly whispers, “we need to be better ... we can be better ... we’re getting better.” For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. We would love to know how we could help! |
About bcI'm a teacher, coach, and parent seeking excellence while defining success on my own terms. Archives
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