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7/30/2020

Urgently Patient

Patience can be good.
It provides the opportunity for growth and reaching our full potential.
As we first learn to ride a bike, we fall often. Each time we fall we get a little closer to being able to successfully ride on our own. Each fall provides valuable feedback for our next ride. Success isn’t instantaneous. It takes time, patience. The urgency to speed up the process is not only futile, but often detrimental. Urgency can be bad.

Patience can be bad.
It dismisses the standard and accepts less than what a job requires, even if only for the short-term.
A young child would never consider walking if not challenged to do so by a loving parent. Why would they? Crawling works. Why walk? If not for the urgency of a loving parent, a child would patiently continue with what has always worked for them in the past. Urgency pushes us out of our comfort zone and towards our potential. Urgency can be good.

Why Should We Care?
The art of leadership is often about striking the right balance. This especially applies for urgency and patience. As leaders, we must be experts in differentiating when we need urgency and when we need patience.

It leads us to a few age-old coaching questions:
When do you push? How much do you push?
When do you wait? How long do you wait?

Although there is no single answer for all solutions, the following guidelines to be helpful:
Lean towards urgency when dealing with the process.
Lean towards patience when dealing with the result.

Our leadership focus should be on the process, specifically on getting the process right. Our time, effort, and focus should be almost solely invested in our process. We must be meticulous with our process. Getting it right is essential to success. Regardless of how often we forget it and how easily our focus slips away from it, it is the process that drives the results.

Urgency around our process is vital in upholding standards and pushing our team to reach its potential. Urgency stands in opposition to complacency. When urgent about the process, we seek growth and embrace failure. When urgent about the result, we grow frustrated and accept the path of least resistance.

Patience for the desired result seems obvious, but clearly is not in the world of instant-gratification we live in. We, and those we lead, begin to believe success comes with the snap of the fingers. This is anything but true for teams, and rightfully so. Greatness takes time. Achieving the highest standard is difficult and often involves several failures along the way. Be thankful that greatness takes time and patience, it separates the willing.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
The trusted process and the desired results above are different for every person and every team. There is no right or wrong, but there clearly is a best. Take a look at the steps below to find your process and identify your results.

Identify Your Core Values
- Yes, your core values. If these aren’t clearly embedded in your process, then it will never last or have the impact / produce the results you desire. Your core values are called “core” for a reason - because they should be central to who you are as a person and what you stand, or don’t stand, for. This is a pretty big deal when talking about being patient enough to trust the process. A process centered on our values is worth being patient for. Likewise, urgency will come naturally around these values because we believe in them - they matter to us. So, walking by subpar standards becomes much harder to do.

Define Your Success
- The result you are pursuing seems to depend on the situation, position, and role you are in. What you want to achieve is clearly different if you are the manager of a bank or a volunteer for a non-profit organization. We will all have different goals personally, and within our teams. However, goals are different than how we define success. In order to maximize our potential in all areas of life, how we define success must be connected to our core values. Living, being true to our core values is the success we should be striving for.

Develop Your Process
- There is a process for everything we do. Our morning routine is a process; conducting a meeting is a process; how we choose to interact with team members is a process. Whatever undertaking you are involved in requires a process to complete it - and all those processes are different. We’re after our personal process here. The one that encourages us to follow our core values, removes distractions and road blocks from our path, and clears the way for our ultimate success.

There is a time and place for both patience and urgency. We need both to be at our best and push our teams to their potential. Recognizing and articulating a core value based process and the aligned results is essential to fulfillment.

For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com.
We would love to know how we could help!

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bcg blog

7/23/2020

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Bad News: You're Going to Suffer

Good News: You Get to Choose How

Choice is powerful. We can choose our friends. We can choose our career. We can choose our clothes. And, as Viktor Frankl profoundly noted, most importantly, we can choose our attitude. The choices we make are not controlled by our circumstances like we often think they are. They belong solely to you, to me.

Much has been written about setting goals and aspirations, as there should be. It’s important, and a consistent attribute for all leaders and those aspiring to excellence. However, I think there is a more important question than what are your goals? Who do you want to be? Or, what dreams do you have?

This question is a much better determinant of what you will actually accomplish. It snaps you from the fairytale dreams into cold reality, but we rarely think of asking it to ourselves.

What suffering are you willing to endure?

Why Should We Care?
This is THE question. It presents you with a clear, simple choice. Those that acknowledge, embrace, and even enjoy the suffering required of their dreams are the ones that achieve them. Those that resent and complain about the suffering never reach their potential and usually cash out before they even get close to it.

Worse yet are those that look to avoid suffering at all costs. Those are the “cold and timid souls” that Theodore Roosevelt refers to in his Man in the Arena passage. These people spend their lives avoiding suffering as an attempt to protect themselves from criticism, judgement, and failure. Their choice to avoid suffering leads to an unfulfilled life - which was their choice. Not choosing is choosing.

For those recognizing that everything worth achieving is going to require suffering and sacrifice of something, the question simply becomes what suffering am I willing to endure? Notice, the question is not what goal am I willing to suffer for. This is an important question to consider, but not the driving force because it zeros in on the result. By focusing so much on the result, we often neglect to consider the entire process. We want to embrace the process fully - that’s where the suffering is.

I was the Athletic Director at Graham HS for 5 years and am still very good friends with the former wrestling Coach at Graham, Jeff Jordan (https://jordantrained.com/). I’m a basketball coach that loves wrestling thanks to Coach Jordan. Wrestling is a great sport and one of the reasons is because of their relationship with suffering. Our basketball team worked out with our wrestlers in the off-season specifically for this reason.

I was around some of the best high school wrestlers in the country while at Graham. At no point can I recall them complaining about cutting weight, working out in a room that was breath-takingly hot, or practicing 2-3 times per day. At Graham, everyone wanted to be a state champ - and a lot of them achieved that goal. But, in order to achieve that goal they had to choose those skipped meals, the discomfort of drilling in a sauna, and extra daily practices. To attempt to avoid that suffering wouldn’t make sense to them. They chose the suffering and the achievement of their goals followed.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
It’s almost laughable how much we dismiss the process for the result - apparently ignorant to the fact that it is always the process that produces the result. Committing ourselves fully to the process is the only way we can achieve what we aspire to.

Here are a few ideas around embracing the process … and the suffering!

“It takes what it takes.” - Nick Saban
- What Saban is referring to with this quote is the suffering you have to choose in order to play college football at the level Alabama expects. Every undertaking ‘takes’ something.

David Taylor (https://www.m2wrestling.com/) was a 4 time state champion wrestler and the #1 wrestler in the country while I was the athletic director at Graham. All four years of his high school career, I would get a call on Christmas morning around 10am asking if I could open the wrestling room so he could get a workout in. Christmas morning, 10am. For David, that’s what it took.

What does it take for you?

Decide if you want to embrace that process
- Training Christmas morning at 10am isn’t for everyone, nor should it be. The process, and suffering, must always mirror the goal though. If I aspire to be a great leader, for example, I must embrace the discomfort of holding others accountable, showing up early to meetings, staying late to listen to a colleague, release success to the team, and accept failure for the team. If I don’t want to enter into difficult conversations for the good of the team, that’s ok. I just can’t be a leader.

Too often we are willing to accept some of the suffering, but try to avoid areas of suffering that we particularly dislike. It doesn’t work. Commit fully or don’t commit.

Make no excuses
- Once you decide you’re in. Remove excuses from your life. The excuses we make are often attempts to avoid or lessen the suffering required of our commitment. They do nothing but undermine our efforts and the process.

Begin by not saying them out loud. You’ll begin catching yourself making an excuse. This self-awareness is essential in breaking the habit loop. As you gain awareness, you will start catching yourself even thinking of an excuse - stopping it before it has a chance to do any damage. Eventually you won’t even consider excuses and will realize the strength that comes with overcoming the challenges you once made an excuse to avoid.

So, back to the original question - What suffering are you willing to endure?

Your answer to that question will determine the level to which you reach your potential in any area of your life. Life is all about suffering. Those who try to avoid it, are choosing the suffering behind an unintentional, insignificant life with minimal depth and minimal impact.

Choose your suffering on purpose. Live intentionally.

For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com.
We would love to know how we could help!

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bcg blog

7/16/2020

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The Selfless Truth

We’ve all done it - to ourselves and to others. We never feel good about it, but we continue to do it in an effort to make ourselves or the other person feel better. And it generally works in the short term - and undermines in the long term. So, you need to decide if you’re in the short game or the long game.

Soothing acceptance of mediocrity or inspiring pursuit of a standard of excellence.

Comforting lies or selfless truth.

Why Should We Care?
Honesty is difficult. It’s easy when spoken in affirmation, but challenging when provided as feedback for improvement. Our choice in these situations usually bounces between two easier paths:

Avoidance - we just ignore the behavior, or action, and don’t address it at all
Acceptance - we accept the subpar behavior, or action, and provide positive reinforcement

Why we make this choice seems clear on the surface - it’s uncomfortable, and we would rather remain comfortable than create discomfort for those around us. This is the common reason most people point to when accountability begins to drift. I disagree.

We avoid and accept when we don’t care enough about the purpose we are pursuing. When invested fully into the mission of the group, discomfort becomes a worthwhile price to pay. Our level of truth becomes a reflection of our selflessness. When we are bought into a cause, or purpose, avoiding behaviors detrimental to that cause (which is anything short of the standard, by the way) is selfish.

Accepting less than what is required is simply choosing personal comfort over team performance. Truth becomes a selfless act, serving both the team and the individual in the long term.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
So, how do we do it? How do we overcome the urge to choose selfless truth over comfortable lies? It’s an important question. One that will not only determine the performance of the team, but also the trajectory of your life.

Choose a purpose you can commit to
- This goes for your personal life, as well as your professional one. There is no question that your belief in, and commitment to, your purpose increases your willingness to embrace selfless truth. When we believe deeply in a cause, prioritizing that cause ahead of personal comfort becomes the obvious choice. Make your purpose something that’s truly important to you and you’ll share, and seek, the truth all the time. Likewise, if we would pursue a professional life that feeds our purpose, we would find that our willingness to hold ourselves and those around us to the standards of excellence would greatly increase as well.

Fill your trust balloon
- The beautiful thing about trust is that there is no shortcut, which is exactly how it should. Trust isn’t built in grand actions, but in small gestures. Each positive, trustworthy action adds a little more air to your trust balloon. Each negative, untrustworthy action takes a little air out. It’s important to note that you can’t fill the trust balloon with one noble action but you can certainly empty it. Trust is what allows selfless honesty to be received. It’s the difference between being a great friend and being a complete jerk. The difference between reaching your potential and settling for average.

Detach from man’s approval
- Much of our desire to pad the truth is a desire to be liked by those around us. In this search for approval we modify, or eliminate, the truth. We think this helps us gain acceptance, but it really just further clouds what we believe and stand for - to ourselves and to others. It’s not that we don’t care what others think, it’s that we don’t care what everyone else thinks. It’s a futile effort. Our ability, or willingness, to communicate the truth without the desire for approval, is a major factor consistently sharing selfless truth.

The challenge is our perspective. The idea of selfless truth is at the center of a servant’s mindset. You lead to serve. Serving is loving. Love those you lead enough to tell them the truth.

For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com.
We would love to know how we could help!

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bcg blog

7/9/2020

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What Do You Believe?

I’m not talking about the ‘eagle view’, big picture question of what do you believe. There have been plenty of blogs, articles, and books written on that one. No, I’m talking about on a daily, moment by moment basis, what do you believe? Have you ever thought about it? If so, have you ever thought about why you hold that belief?

Most people will tell you what they believe, then you’ll watch their actions and see no connection between what they say they believe and what their actions say they believe. As a leader, this isn’t a mistake we can afford to make. We must do the work to understand ourselves, know our beliefs, then choose our behaviors to reflect those beliefs.

If we don’t gain this self-awareness, we can’t be surprised when our team doesn’t follow.

The clarity of purpose is essential in maximizing our impact.

Why Should We Care?
Our actions are the direct result of our beliefs. We act in accordance with what we believe - whether we express the belief verbally or not. Of course, anyone can hide it for a little while but eventually the two always align. Therein lies the problem.

Most people, teams, companies are smart enough to pick values and standards that look great on the wall or sound good in the meeting room. And oftentimes, the values selected are virtues and noble when put into action. But, if that action fails to come, now we have a serious problem. Not only are we confusing our team, but we’re driving away our best people.

The best people in any organization know who they are and they know why they choose to work, or do, what they do. That’s right, you aren’t choosing them. They’re choosing you. And they aren’t choosing cultures that don’t line up.

In order for a culture to align, the value, the belief, and the behavior must match. This is rare and is precisely what makes elite teams.

Regardless of your food preference, most people understand this example:

McDonald’s Mission Statement
(https://www.comparably.com/companies/mcdonalds/mission)
McDonald's brand mission is to be our customers' favorite place and way to eat and drink. Our worldwide operations are aligned around a global strategy called the Plan to Win, which center on an exceptional customer experience – People, Products, Place, Price and Promotion.

Chick-fil-A Mission Statement
(https://www.thebalancesmb.com/food-beverage-mission-statements-4068551)
"Be America's best quick-service restaurant.” "To glorify God by being a faithful steward of all that is entrusted to us

Of course the quality of the food matters, just as the talent on your team matters, but it’s the alignment between what Chick-fil-A says they believe and their actions that makes them elite - not their chicken sandwich.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
So, the question then becomes how do we align our values, beliefs, and actions so we can attract, and keep, the best people while working to help our team reach its potential. There is a process, unfortunately it’s not an easy one. Time, effort, and consistent maintenance will be required.

The steps below are applicable to your company, your team, or just you - and equally important to each.

Core Values → Behaviors → Beliefs
- You first need to identify your core values, behaviors and beliefs. What is important to you? Who do you aspire to be? What actions/behaviors in others is admirable? Do you have any ‘words to live by’? This can only be done by spending considerable time reflecting and considering what is truly important to you. Talking through it with a good listener can provide great insight as well.

The Habit Loop
- In order to break our routine of just doing what you’ve always done, you will need to form new habits to be sure your actions are lining up with your desired values. This is a challenging step and can easily ruin all the work you put into finding your values, behaviors, and beliefs. Establishing routines around the same time of day, setting reminders on your phone, and prioritizing your commitment to your behaviors is essential.

Hold Accountability
- How are you rewarding aligned behavior and addressing behavior that doesn’t align? That question applies to the individual as well as the team. The standard is the one you walk by … if it doesn’t get addressed, then that’s the new standard.

So back to the original question, what is it that you believe? If you’ve done the work to know yourself, then you have an answer. If not, you’ll make something up that sounds good and was really what one of your parents or mentors believed.

Do your actions express that belief? Now that’s a great question.
Excellence is rooted in the alignment of our beliefs and actions.

For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com.

We would love to know how we could help!

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bcg blog

7/2/2020

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Reason or Excuse - Does It Matter?

No. The answer is no. It doesn’t matter.
Whatever you tell yourself when you don’t meet the standard; whatever justification you make for not achieving the goal - it doesn’t matter. The fact is, the mission wasn’t accomplished.

For most, a reason and an excuse are different. A reason seems to be more justified, more legit. While an excuse is viewed as less reasonable, inferior. As you can see, Merriam-Webster doesn’t differentiate as much as you might:

Reason - a statement offered in explanation or justification (www.Merriam-Webster.com)
Excuse - something offered as justification (www.Merriam-Webster.com)

Why Should We Care?
Let’s say you start viewing them as the same and refuse to use either one. Anytime you feel the need to make an excuse, you say nothing - to yourself or out loud. You make no justification for the failure. You simply own it and move on. Why is that so hard to do?

We spend so much time and energy trying to rationalize, or justify, our shortcomings, not realizing that each of those justifications only weakens our character and makes it more likely that we’ll accept less of ourselves the next time.

Whatever happened to make us so afraid of coming up short, that we have to find an excuse to make it feel ok - because that’s all it’s doing, making it FEEL ok. It’s really not. The mere act of making the excuse actually compounds the failure and minimizes the importance of the goal you set out to achieve.

We would serve ourselves, and those around us, well if we banned ourselves from giving any reason for underperformance. Simply saying ‘I wasn’t good enough this time’ or ‘I have to get better’, while it seems embarrassing at the time is actually incredibly empowering. By fully owning every failure, you are placing the power of choice back in your control - and dismissing the power of circumstance, which you don’t control.

We need to do this at an individual level, but the results are anything but impactful to only you. By taking responsibility for all failings of our team, we free those we are leading to challenge the norm and pursue levels previously thought unattainable. Without this freedom, people turn to safety and the status quo.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
Stopping the excuse making habit doesn’t happen without very intentional and mindful actions. It makes us feel good, at least better, to justify any lack of performance. It’s a natural tendency to do so, but that doesn’t make it good for us. Here are a few ideas to become better at shutting down our excuse making mindset.

Excuses Ignored
- An aspect of excuse making that we rarely think about is when we ignore potential excuses. Every great accomplishment in our lives has been the result of us ignoring many perfectly plausible excuses. We don’t accomplish anything without sacrificing something. Every one of those sacrifices was a potential excuse that we chose not to make. Take a few minutes to write down the excuses you ignored in the last accomplishment you are proud of. The mere fact that you ignored them once should let you know that you are capable of ignoring them again.
Excuses Announced
- Excuses are like a lot of other things, we see them clearly in others but are unable to recognize them in ourselves. To help with this, ask a friend or colleague to point out every time you make an excuse. The best way to initiate the activity is to have partners share stories of failure, times when they did not reach the goal or accomplish the mission. As the listener, pay close attention to reasons the person sharing may want to use to justify this failure - then point it out to them. Don’t be surprised by denial, we are very protective of our egos!
Excuse Board
- Public sharing is a great way to increase awareness and hold others accountable. For this activity, ask each team member to write up to 3 excuses they’ve used or heard in the last week on a post-it. Collect and share all the excuses with the group as a way to begin the journey of eliminating excuses from their mindset. As other excuses are made, add them to the board. This also serves as a great reminder to team members that they are not the only ones dealing with the urge to make excuses.

If I throw a good pass to a teammate and the teammate doesn’t catch the pass, then guess what? It wasn’t a good pass. The only good pass is a completed pass. No qualifiers.
Make the commitment to living your life the same way - with no qualifiers, no excuses.
For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com.
We would love to know how we could help!

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bcg blog

Urgently Patient

bcg blog

Bad News: You're Going to Suffer

Good News: You Get to Choose How

bcg blog

The Selfless Truth

bcg blog

What Do You Believe?

bcg blog

Reason or Excuse - Does It Matter?

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Reason or Excuse - Does It Matter?

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Bad News: You're Going to Suffer

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The Selfless Truth