bcg blog

Know Your Chickens

It’s April 2023 and we’re in Lissone, Italy. I’m coaching Team Ohio in the Jit Lissone tournament. Our team has yet to meet each other, let alone practice together. At this point, basketball is an afterthought. We’re just trying to get from the airport to the hotel. 

The ride in the local taxi was like being in a real-life version of Mario Kart with another hundred cars on the road with us, a reckless driver as our guide, and everyone honking, waiving their fists, and shouting profanities. I was literally on the edge of my seat.

Now at our hotel we connected with our host that would take care of the travel to and from the gym. He was a local also, but seemed much more … relaxed than our previous driver. Alberto is our guy and would become a highlight of the entire trip. He greets us with a handshake, a hug, and a hearty  “Bonjourno!”. He was the Italy I expected, or at least hoped for.

Alberto is clearly a seasoned vet. He is engaging with all eight of us in the van at the same time. Cracking jokes, carrying on conversations on his phone, navigating traffic, checking on our plans for the evening … and he’s doing it all without slowing down. It really is amazing.

Then, Alberto takes the most memorable call of the trip. As he goes back and forth with a friend and is wrapping up the conversation, he chuckles and carelessly says (with his cool Italian accent quipped), “Ah, yes, I know my chicken!”

I immediately think, chicken?! Too memorable to ignore, I ask what the phrase means. Alberto hesitates, searching for just the right English words to match, then replies:

“Ah, you know, eh, very close; my chicken, very close. 
They your chicken, you their chicken; very close. You do anything for them.
I know my chicken.”

Why Should We Care?
It was at this moment I began to wonder, who are my chickens? 

I’m lucky and have a family that is “very close”. They are my chickens. But, beyond that, identifying my chickens wasn’t so easy. I have a few, but it’s not a lot. And, I suppose that’s how it’s supposed to be. I mean, who wants too many chickens, right?

To be your chicken, you must’ve seen the other person at their low point and chose to stay with them. You must’ve gone through some really difficult things together and grown closer as a result of it. You can never question their intentions. When good things happen, you are happier for them than you are for yourself. No distance is too far to drive and no time is too late or early. Time literally flies when you’re with one of your chickens. Even time apart evaporates as soon as you reconnect with your chicken - you immediately pick up right where you left off. 

Chickens are not best friends. The relationship doesn’t have the ups and downs of even the closest friendships. Think of them like the special forces for your foxhole. They energize you, lighten your mood, and guide you to see the best of yourself and others. 

I’m confident you have a chicken or two. Don’t take them for granted - take advantage of every opportunity to spend time with them. You’ll never regret it.

REAL TALK - Action Steps
If you’re struggling to figure out who your chickens are, I think I can help. If you’re in a relationship, I hope your significant other is one of your chickens. If not, well, that sucks - probably need to fix that. Here are a few ideas on singling out a few chickens.

• They Lift Each Other Up
  
  • Your chicken lifts you up. You are better with them and they are better with you. Being a chicken is always bidirectional - if you’re my chicken, then I’m your chicken … or else you wouldn’t be my chicken. Chickens see the absolute best in you and expose parts of you that you would hide otherwise, robbing the world of something only you can contribute. You never feel vulnerable around your chicken - you feel like you have superpowers.
    

• They Make You Laugh
  
  • Your chicken is funny, even if only to you - a lot of times only to you. The inside jokes grow with every shared experience. You smile when you see them, regardless of where you are or what you’re doing, and everyone else kind of disappears. Sharing time and sharing space with your chicken is enough. You don’t really need to do anything, just be.
    

• They Make You Optimistic
  
  • Your chicken helps you see the best in yourself and others. If you were down in the dumps, now you’re not. They’re your personal dealer of hope. You think and act as your true self when you are with them. The glass is always half full. And, of course, the worst adventures turn into the best stories when they happen with your chicken
    

Where we spend our time is a choice. We all have lives to live. But, when you have an opportunity to spend time with your chicken, don’t let it pass you by. You never get the opportunity back.

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