 "It wasn't your baby."The Andes Mountains are brutal. At the foot of the mountains, a group of raiders swept through a remote village in the middle of the night resulting in complete chaos, as one would imagine. They killed livestock, ravaged homes, and even kidnapped a baby. The child’s mother watched helplessly as they disappeared into the dark peaks of the mountains with her infant. When dawn finally arrived, several of the village leaders gathered in hopes of a recovery mission. Armed and determined, they headed into the mountains to track the raiders and bring the child back home. But, after days of scouring the steep, dangerous mountainside, they returned empty-handed. Exhausted and defeated, they could do nothing but apologize to the heart-broken mother.
Then, quietly, the mother set off alone. No packed supplies. No ceremony. Armed with nothing but a single purpose. Days passed, and just as hope in the village began to fade, she returned. Dirty, bruised, and weary … with her baby cradled on her back, alive and safe. Stunned, the villagers gathered around her. Their joy quickly turned to disbelief. The leaders of the village, joyful yet embarrassed, asked with genuine amazement “How did you do what we couldn’t?” Her reply was simple: “It wasn’t your baby.” Why Should We Care? The story isn’t folklore - it’s leadership in its rawest form. The difference wasn’t strength, skill, or experience. It was purpose. When something matters deeply to you - when it’s your baby - you’ll find a way through things others find impossible. In the world of leadership and personal growth, that kind of clarity and resolve is rare. But it’s the key to doing hard things consistently. And, leadership is full of hard things. Purpose drives excellence. It transforms effort into grit and fear into resolve. Leaders with purpose don’t need to shout - they move with intention, and others follow. Teams led by a shared purpose don’t just perform; they believe. And belief is the fuel that carries people up mountains they never imagined they could climb - or would need to climb. REAL TALK - Action Steps We don’t drift upstream. If we want to consistently tap into the true power of purpose, we have to become intentional. Here’s a few ideas on where to start:
The mother’s purpose gave her a strength beyond endurance, clarity beyond fear, and resilience no obstacle could conquer. What’s yours doing for you? Checkout Surrender the Outcome on Amazon and order The Score That Matters with Ryan Hawk & Brook Cupps. The latest blog from Blue Collar Grit can be found here!
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 Whitewashed TombstonesMickey had his name on the door, the coolest sweat suit, and exuded the confidence that made parents trust him with their son's future. On recruiting calls, he spoke with authority about his knowledge of the next level and the importance of the parent-coach relationship. His resume gleamed with high profile recommendations, coaching accolades at every stop, and the numerous achievements of each player he had coached.
But behind his charming smile, Mickey was drowning. He hadn't actually had the time to watch any recruiting film in several months, relying instead on his assistant's summaries and rankings published by the various media outlets. When the time for recruiting calls came, he flipped on the charm and offered vague reassurances while avoiding any meaningful connection. Mickey never ventured beneath the surface of relationships and rarely stepped outside his comfort zone to even explore his own original thoughts. The façade finally crumbled when his team found itself in the midst of a four game losing streak. Mickey was overwhelmed by the multitude of issues that seemed to spring up out of nowhere, his confident demeanor evaporated as it became clear he didn't understand himself or his own system. Within weeks, the four games turned into twelve. A closer look by his administration revealed his incompetence, and his carefully constructed reputation turned to ash. Mickey had spent so much energy maintaining the appearance of a successful coach that he'd never actually developed the skills to be one. Everything looked great from the outside, but the inside was absent of any true substance - kind of like a whitewashed tombstone. Why Should We Care? There are a lot of people whitewashing their tombstones. And, a lot of them are leaders, or at least in a position of leadership. The danger, I hope you can see, is that the leader's lack of substance is no longer misleading a single person, but an entire group. The human, and often financial, toll can compound quickly. A breach of trust is at the core of the charade. Leadership effectiveness depends almost entirely on trust, and nothing destroys trust faster than being exposed as incompetent or inauthentic. Few leaders ever recover. Teams become cynical, top performers leave, and cultures suffer lasting damage. Prioritizing appearing knowledgeable over actually being knowledgeable not only violates trust, but it propels a leader into a vicious cycle of becoming defensive, risk-averse, and isolated - exactly the opposite of what effective leadership requires. They spend more energy protecting their image than serving their people. REAL TALK - Action Steps Leaders set the tone for their culture. When leaders prioritize appearance over substance, they encourage their teams to do the same. This creates organizations full of people focused on looking good rather than being good - a recipe for mediocrity and eventual failure. Here are a few ideas to help you avoid it:
Leadership often comes down to this simple choice: will you spend your energy becoming someone worth following, or just appearing to be? Checkout Surrender the Outcome on Amazon and order The Score That Matters with Ryan Hawk & Brook Cupps. The latest blog from Blue Collar Grit can be found here! |
About bcI'm a teacher, coach, and parent seeking excellence while defining success on my own terms. Archives
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