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bcg Blog

5/4/2023

1 Comment

 
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Prove It

A lot of people nowadays have never heard of the basketball game HORSE or PIG, which is sad. It’s a driveway classic that gives the old, slower, less athletic hoopers among us a chance to taste victory every once in a while. 

In HORSE, one player shoots a shot. If he makes it, then the next person has to make it or they get an H, or the next letter in the word HORSE. Players are eliminated from the game when they get an E. However, depending on who you are playing with, you may be required to “prove it” even after the other player misses the final shot. To “prove it” you simply have to make the same shot again. 

By proving it, you remove all doubt.

Why Should We Care?
Too often we live a life of existence, applying little thought to our lives and why we even do the things we do. We don’t know why we work, why we go to school, why we talk to our friends or kids the way we do … And, when asked, we simply default to the canned response, “I don’t know, that’s just what I do.”

Pretty sad approach if you think about it, isn’t it? To just exist?

To combat the societal pull for just fitting in, we can consider a simple question that will push you to consider the potential of your life beyond existing. 

What is your proof of life?

The things that “prove it” for you, that remove all doubt, are your proofs of life.
Do more of them. 

Most people will immediately take this to weekend plans, vacations, and nights out with friends. And, they certainly may be proof of life for you. However, to fully understand what it is that thrusts us beyond an existent life we need to dig a layer deeper and consider what it is about those weekend plans, vacations, and nights out that prove we are alive.

Is it the social interaction with others? Is it the sharing of time with loved ones? Is it the experience of something new that you’ve never seen? Once we know the reason, we can be intentional about including that behavior and purpose in more of our activities.

It’s intentionality to what’s important to us that proves it. 

REAL TALK - Action Steps
Understanding your proof of life requires awareness, which is probably why so many people remain existent. Here are a few things to consider in hopes of gaining the awareness necessary to live fully. 

  • Wonder
    • Be curious. It’s such a great quality for everyone, but it’s critical for those aspiring to gain awareness of themselves. Specifically, grow curious about your feelings and emotions. What were the causes of them? Why do you feel the way you do? Is there a particular story you tell yourself to evoke a specific feeling? If we never ask the answer will always remain, because.

  • Recognize
    • Be observant. When your goats got, notice who got it and how they got it - redneck grandpa advice, but sound nonetheless. Paying attention to the people and things that brighten our day, we look forward to seeing, and time is of no factor are proof of life. We can’t construct an intentional, meaningful life without knowing this.

  • Ask
    • Be inquisitive. Given that we are terrible at being self-aware, consider asking others the exact thing you are trying to understand. What do you think gives me energy? What do you think I enjoy doing the most? Who do you think I value being around the most? The answers are typically far more accurate than you would expect. Others know us better than we realize.

If nothing else comes from this, I hope you will at least ask yourself if you are existing or living. And, if you say your living, have the courage to ask yourself to prove it.

For more information on building excellence in your teams, visit us at www.bluecollargrit.com. 
We would love to know how we could help!

1 Comment
Dan Cunningham
5/18/2023 03:23:57 pm

It's very sad to see so many are living an existence or just "sleep walking" through life.

And I wholeheartedly agree with your proof of life concept. All of us would benefit from knowing what our proof of life is (I call this value orientation)... and then ask WHY, WHY, WHY.

Asking why they are our proof of life / values helps provide clarity. It helps crystalize and orient us to them even more. And then we can even create a hierarchy of them.

Curious, observe and inquisitive is definitely the way to do it. Simple but not easy... which is why I suspect most people are still in existence stage / sleep walking!

By putting in the necessary work, we get more pleasure from life, more intentionality and more authenticity.

There's a decent book called "A life of One's Own" where the author, Marion Milner, embarks on a 7 year personal journey reflecting and journaling about her her everyday life in order to uncover elements of her 'Proof of Life'. Quite the commitment!

Coach: By the way, as I age, I imagine playing more and more horse with my growing kids. Until then, when we play pickup up on the driveway, the winner has to "confirm" their win with a free throw or two. We call it "consolidate" their win.

If they miss, we go back to the previous score and keep playing. i think I should call it "Moment of Truth"!!!!

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    I'm a teacher, coach, and parent seeking excellence while defining success on my own terms.

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